The Most Painful Feeling in the World

 As I was sitting on our dining table this morning while chatting my someone special, I just remembered and thought of something that comes out to my mind, “What is the most painful feeling in the world?

When i asked myself that question, I never knew what comes up to my mind; not because I know nothing of it, but I know most of it (the feeling). It took me quite a while to phrase my answer in such a way it would not appear as too deep. “Perhaps it’s being unwanted, unloved and being avoided."

  So here I am writing this entry because I owe it to myself.

THE MOST PAINFUL FEELING(S) IN THE WORLD

1. It’s when you wake up in the wee hours of the morning wanting to talk to somebody about something bothering you but nobody’s there to talk to you;

2. It’s when you send a message (FB, SMS, etc.) in any communication platform but end up getting seen-zoned;

3. That feeling when you're feeling depressed and end up crying every night and cannot explain how you feel.

4. It’s when you want to finish editing your vlog on your phone but keeps on running out of memory and can't finish doing your vlog;

5. It’s when you want to write or put up something even just a poem on your blogsite but you cannot think of any idea that will come up because you are still being bothered or you're still wondering on what are you going to put on your blogsite.

(PLEASE GIVE JUSTICE TO THOSE FIVE WORDS WRITTEN ABOVE);

6. It’s when waiting for someone to say goodnight, you end up waiting for several hours no matter how droopy your eyes already are, end up sleeping through the long wait and waking up realizing your inbox is still empty;

7. It’s when he/she’s online, and knows you’re also online but couldn’t even drop you a line or two;

8. It's when you realize that some connections will never be able to explain.

9.It's when you realize that some people stay and some people will leave on your life.

10.If you are really curious enough you can sense from what is real to fake especially when you realize that you are already being avoided by some people around you.

11.It's when your childhood BFF has a new group of friends from other country that she lived in and starts to forget and avoid you.

12. It's when you get so emotional hearing the word "Goodbye or farewell in other words but have nothing to do but accept them;

13.It's when you feel irritated or annoyed so fast without any reason and wanting to cry especially during night time when you fall asleep but have nothing to do with them.

There are a lot of painful feelings in the world; emotional, physical pain, etc. But the emotional pain is something that time could possibly heal, but will leave you scarred for life. Yes, it will heal. But it will leave a mark that someday, in one way or another, make you remember how much pain you have gone through and how much you had to struggle to get through it.

Not all who bore this kind of pain survived. But it does not make them any weaker. Because I believe each of us has a story to tell. And it is in knowing the story that we can truly understand why people who gave up in the middle of the race, did not make it at the end of the finish line. But there are also some people survived in some ways.